It is secret because my beloved hails from the wrong side of the Atlantic; an outsider from far shores rather than one with roots here reaching back millennia. Perhaps I am attracted to the novelty, her forbidden nature. Perhaps I will weary of her when familiarity blunts the edge of emotion.
But now...now I go out of my way to visit the places I know she hangs out. I eagerly scan every branch, head cocked listening for her voice. When she isn't there, I am disappointed, and when I see her face emerge from the shadows, nonchalantly checking me out before going on with her business, my heart skips a little beat and I stare like a goof until she flits away, out of sight. Utterly uninterested in me beyond ascertaining that I am not a threat.
The look of someone with a perhaps-too-enthusiastic admirer. |
More conventionally attractive birds may come into view: a majestic red-tailed hawk soaring overhead, or a charming, chattery chickadee frolicking in nearby branches. But my gaze always turns back to look for the sparrow.
I wish her the best, and hope she and her family settle in and become a well-integrated part of the neighborhood. Maybe one day she will appear in my backyard, along with or in place of the abundant, less alluring house sparrows. Until then, I will continue to admire her from afar, undeterred as she remains aloof.
*Or he...I honestly don't know and haven't asked.